coda

the accompanying audio was composed from the ashes of my heart, a direct reflection of my soul's cry in the moments that followed

to continue, raise volume and click button to begin
      

When we met, we had a spark When we sparked, we made a beautiful fire One half of me, one half of you, evenly balanced You took what I had that you needed, and I did the same We healed each other, through the toughest of times When we reached our next chapter, we were in it together Two warrior spirits against the world The task was monumental but we made it work Throughout the hardship and trials, we had each other You’d say things would always work out, I believed you And they all did When we first faltered, we still held each other Two immovable cosmic energies of love that could not sway the other One hurt from within One hurt from the other But, in each others eyes, we still saw the fire I stayed, because I truly believed your spirit was destined for mine You stayed, and I forgave You’d say things would always work out, I believed you And most did When you two talked, I knew it was different In my heart a different feeling emerged One of worry and doubt The group was good for you, and I didn’t want to take it away I started talking to express the worry in my heart I ended talking reassured You’d say things would always work out, I believed you And some did When you said you had the conversation, I believed you I believed it was done I was relieved, yet the feeling in my heart remained I tried to talk and let you know I told my self it was my problem being more insecure When you bonded our kindred spirits in the kitchen that night, my worries left and I knew you were forever You’d say things would always work out, I believed you And they didn’t When you were gone so long, I had a hole in my chest Something cosmic told me something was wrong I was unsure of the anxiety’s cause but it was insurmountable When you got home late and told the story it didn’t go away When you’d hide your phone it didn’t go away When you compared my worry to when you accused me it didn’t go away When you stopped wanting to spend time with me it didn’t go away When you got more upset than I’d seen you get upset with me before it didn’t go away That morning, I knew in my heart what was going to happen, what my brain had explained away That day, my life was on pause That night, my love died That night, my soul died It makes sense the only force strong enough to break an intertwining of spirits so robust would need to be the one who built it My soul, crudely torn away from yours Pieces left behind Torn and wrenched, tighter with each lie If you had tried to make it work with me, would I have ever found out about the rest? With time it will heal But it cannot regrow all A piece of me forever stuck with the poisoned fruit A shell of what once was Just as our relationship started with poems, it must end with one But not as a vow, as I hoped. Not with the spiritual ring you created upon my hand and then shattered As my futile attempt of closure. As a goodbye.